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Thursday, April 26, 2007

New vs. comfy


I don't know why, but recently I've been thinking about what's better...new or comfy? I think that there are pros and cons to both. When thinking about shoes, comfy is great b/c you know they fit, you know they feel good, they're already worn in, and they're reliable. New is good though, too, b/c they are exciting to put on, have never been worn, are still nice and clean, etc.

I was thinking about new vs. comfy in more of a relationship type way. Especially since Jason and I have been married for almost a year. My sister, Lexie, called the other day and was saying how Jason and I are still newlyweds (her and Jon are celebrating their 4th anniversary today). I kind of laughed and thought to myself, "we aren't newlyweds anymore." But then that made me really sad for some reason. We haven't even been married a year yet and I feel like I'm stuck in the "comfortable phase." To be honest, I'm so glad to be comfortable with Jason and not have to play the dating game anymore. But at the same time, I've got to find ways to keep the newness and excitement going. I still want to feel like a newlywed, but still have all the perks of being comfortable with each other. Can I have my cake and eat it too?

New Pros:

  • It's exciting
  • The anticipation of the unknown

New Cons:

  • You can't be your real self to some extent
  • Having to be on your best behavior in order to impress
  • Awkward

Comfy Pros:

  • It's reliable
  • You can count on it
  • Trusty

Comfy Cons:

  • "To the extent that men and women become real to each other, they cease to be princes and princesses, gods and goddesses who inspire romantic fantasies or amorous worship."
  • Taking what you have for granted

Then I read this article that basically says you can enjoy all the goods of comfy while still keeping things new and exciting. Dilemma solved.

There's another good article about how to keep the love alive. Such good advice!

Which do you prefer, new or comfy?

2 comments:

Just a Italian Girl said...

Stick with comfy, like you said trusty and reliable. Besides the new is not really all that great. Its awkward! Spontinaity is key! (Did I spell that right?)

Hanah said...

Comfy with a little pizazz sp? I love knowing my husband loves me no matter how I look, there is definitely a security there, but that makes me want to try all the harder to make sure I look presentable everyday. When he leaves the house to go to work I want him to remember the me that tries to look decent, instead of the run down mom look of me. :) The key to keeping the pizazz is to make time for each other every day even if it is a two minute make-out session, letting your man know you still desire him. :) and also laugh together every day. It's amazing how that can help ease the tension of daily living keep the newness or the funness in your marriage.