Good Riddens To Bad Rubbish

I had such a heavy burden lifted off my shoulders today. I finally had Jason’s cell phone turned off. I know what some of you are thinking…why on Earth was I still paying for his cell phone? Well, let me defend myself a little in saying that I didn’t want to pay the $175 cancellation fee by cancelling before the 2 year contract was up and I also wanted to help him get a job so he could pay child support (which is funny b/c I have yet to see so much as a single penny from him since I left him 18 months ago) and he was using the cell phone number to put on resumes. So, I kept paying the $10 a month for him to have the phone b/c it was cheaper for me and it was in hopes of helping him get a job. Well, he has a job now and I made the call and cut loose the last little string that tied me to him (other than him being Autumn’s father). It feels so good and so liberating! Some of you may remember I did a post a few weeks ago about NOT being a doormat anymore. Well, the whole cell phone/Jason situation was what I was referring to.

It is so liberating and empowering to get rid of negative things in life. I will always care for him as Autumn’s father and want to have a good relationship with him for her sake. But it’s nice to be rid of all the emotional baggage that came along with knowing what woman of the week or mistress of the month he was talking to and how often. I just hope they don’t get hurt the way I did, b/c I wouldn’t even wish that on my worst enemy.

Being able to take a step back and look at my life for the past 2 years with an objective view, I can see how much I have learned, how much I have matured, how important making good choices are, and what true happiness is. True happiness is when I pick Autumn up at daycare and she throws her arms around my neck and gives me a kiss on the cheek and there is pure and unconditional love in her eyes. She was worth all of the heartache and pain I ever went through with her father. I now have such empathy for anyone who has ever been through divorce. I feel like I am stronger b/c of the pain and suffering I have had to endure.

Thank you to every single one of you that has put a kind comment on my blog, asked how I was doing, sent me an encouraging text message, let me vent (I have done that a lot), etc. All of my friends and family have meant the world to me!

HERE’S TO LEAVING THE PAST IN THE PAST AND LOOKING FORWARD TO A BRIGHTER AND BETTER FUTURE!