Hopefully A Proud Mothering Moment

Tonight after work/school we went over to Mom & Dad’s house for dinner.  Mom had made a huge pan full of rice and yummy gravy w/ meat b/c she took 1/2 of it to the church where they were taking it to a women’s shelter.  After dinner Autumn was super emotional (even more than normal) and would just start crying if we breathed wrong.  I took her in the other room away from everyone else and the TV and we snuggled on the couch and I tried to get her to tell me what was wrong.  I asked her if something had happened at school and she said no.  I asked her about 58 different questions about school and the kids and her teacher and lunch time to see what was wrong.  She never said and was just being moody, so we snuggled some more and went back in the other room.

We were watching TV and talking to Mom & Aunt Jeri and Autumn was still over emotional and started sobbing again.  I asked her what was wrong and she said she wanted to go snuggle on Uncle Nate’s bed.  We went in there and I rubbed her back and just waited for her to start talking since she obviously needed some time.  She finally opened up and come to find out, the whole reason she is upset is b/c tomorrow is show & tell day (news to me) and that she didn’t have any toys she could take!!!  I almost started laughing and saying, “really, are you kidding me?  You’re the most spoiled kid ever b/c of how many toys you have.”  But, I realized that wasn’t going to help the situation so I just let her keep talking.

She’s worried that the other kids in her class won’t like what toy she brings and that they’ll laugh at her.  I asked her what toy she plans on bringing and she didn’t even know yet.  The underlying issue of the whole matter is that she doesn’t feel like she’s the best at anything.  I had no idea she was such a perfectionist, especially since it’s only the 2nd day of school.

We talked about how different people have different talents.  To illustrate the point, we talked about how Andrew is better at reading than her, but she’s better are cutting and coloring than he is.  One isn’t better or worse than the other, they’re just different talents.  If she wants to get better at reading or something else, we’ll work on it together.  I reminded her that we’re on the same team and that I’m there to help her (Momastery style).

Then we watched “You Are Special” by Max Lucado.  I have always loved that book and thought watching the little 8 minute video would be good.  She lost interest about 1/2 way through b/c I don’t think she was understanding the message behind the stars and dots.  So, we talked about the very most important thing at school is not that you’re the best at everything, or the most popular, or the prettiest.  The 2 most important things are that you are kind to others (Momastery style) and that you try your best.

We talked about serving others so we learn to be unselfish (like thinking she doesn’t have enough toys).  She asked what unselfish meant, so I gave her some examples.  Like how Papa mowed the lawn today and decided to mow Mr. Jim’s lawn (our neighbor) while he was at it.  Then I gave her the example of how Mimi made extra food today to take and share it w/ those who aren’t as lucky as we are.  Then I shared how Aunt Jeri is crocheting a shawl for women to wear in the temple if they get too cold.  All those things are service and help us think of others instead of ourselves.

She seemed to understand and hopefully it sunk in.  I had a proud mothering moment b/c I feel like I listened to her problem, we talked through it, and learned how to make it better.  I get mothering wrong a lot of the time, but tonight it felt good to get it right.  We’ll see how she does tomorrow after school to really tell if I got through to her or not.

Papa said he had something special that Autumn could take to show & tell tomorrow.  He came back in the house w/ Clara, our zipper spider.  She has been missing for a long time and we weren’t sure if she was just hiding or dead.  As you can see, she’s dead.  He found her over near where we hang up our swimming towels.  It looks like something squished the back of her.  Dad said those might be eggs she was trying to lay.  Either way, we’re sad she’s dead.  He went to get a Mason jar to put Clara in for Autumn to take to school tomorrow if she wants (EWW) and he came back w/ a gecko he had caught.  We watched the gecko for a little bit (his eyes are really cool) and then went and let him go.  It will be interesting to see if Autumn chooses to take a dead zipper spider or a Barbie for her show & tell.